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About Varied / Hobbyist Member Leonardo WellingtonMale/United States Group :iconxx-the-revolution-xx: xX-The-Revolution-Xx
 
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Dear LillionaBeleren
I don't really know how to tell you this, but our affair is over. I think I realized it when I threw up in your sock drawer as you were eating a Kraft dinner and I saw you sat on the Catholic priest. I'm sure you're sterile enough to understand the Middle-East is planning their revenge on you. I'm returning your nose-hair clippers but keeping your glass eye as a memory. You should also know that I get sick when I think of your feet and you ruined my attempts at another Cold War.
Go drown yourself, your loving brother, L.W. Wellington.

_______________________________________________________________


Dear (Person of Choice), I don't really know how to tell you this, but (1). I think I realized it (2)(3) and I saw you (4)(5). I'm sure you're (6) enough to understand (7). I'm returning (8) but keeping (9) as a memory. You should also know that I (10) and (11).
(12), (Your name or username.)



1) What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - I'm in love with your cat
Red - Our affair is over
White - The rainbow hedgehogs want to destroy you
Black -Our romance is over
Green- Our socks don't match
Grey - You're a leprechaun
Yellow - I'm selling myself for candy
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - I'm joining the Convent
Other -I dislike your eyelashes

2) Which is your birth month?
January - That night you picked your nose
February -When I quoted Forrest Gump
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on peanut butter
May - When I threw up in your sock drawer
June - When you put cuffs on me
July – When I saw the purple monkey
August - When you smacked my ass
September - When we skinny dipped in the bathtub
October - Last year when you peed your pants
November - When your dog humped my leg
December - When I finally changed my underwear

3) Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Chicken- In your car
Pasta - Outside of your office
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad – As you were eating Kraft Dinner
Lasagna - In your closet
Kebab - With Jean Chrétien
Seafood - In a clown suit
Sandwiches - At the Elton John concert
Pizza - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a street light
Annat- With George Bush and Stephen Harper

4) What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Ignore
Red - Put whipped cream on
Black - Hit on
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - bit of
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the pants off of
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive over

5) What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My boyfriend
White - My father
Grey - The Catholic Priest
Brown - The Montreal Canadiens' goalie
Purple - my corned beef hash
Red - My knee caps
Blue - My salt-beef bucket
Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana
Orange - My Blink 182 cd
Pink - Your "My Little Pony" collection
Other --The elephant in the corner

6) What do you prefer to watch on TV?
One Tree Hill - Senile
Heroes- Frostbitten
Lost - High
Simpsons- Cowardly
The news - Scarred
American Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Open
Top Model - Middle-class
Annat - shamed
House- Sterile

7) Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful you are
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That I get turned on only by garbage men
Angry - That your smell makes me vomit
Depressed – That we're related
Excited - That I may pee my pants
Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
Worried - That your Ford sucks
Apathetic - That you need a sex-change
Silly - That I'm allergic to your earlobes
Cuddly - That Santa doesn't exist
Ashamed - That there is no solution to you being a dumb kid
Other - That your driving sucks

8) What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your toe ring
Yellow - Your love letters to me
Red - The pictures from Vegas
Black - Your pet rock
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - Your car
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your nose hair clippers
Grey - Our matching snoopy underwear
Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your balls

9) The first letter of your first name?
A/B - Your virginity
C/D - Your photo with the moustache drawn on it
E/F - Your neighbors dog
G/H - The oil tank from your car
I/J - Your left ear
K/L - The results of that blood-sample
M/N - Your glass eye
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X – Your sucide note
Y/Z - Your credit cards

10) The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Get sick when I think of your feet
C/D - Always will remember the pep talks
E/F -Never will forget that night
G/H – Will not tell the authorites that you stole the whale from the backyard.
I/J – Mocked you behind your back constantly
K/L - Hate your cooking
M/N - Told in my confession today about the moose poaching
O/P - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises
Q/R - Always wanted to break your legs
S/T - Love your sweet, sweet ass
U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my hear
W/X - Haven't showered in a month
Y/Z – am better off without you

11) What do you prefer to drink?
Wine- Our friendship is ruined
Soft drink – I love Oprah
Milk - The apartment building is on fire
Water – I'm scratching my butt as you read this
Cider– I have a passionate interest for mice
Juice – You ruined my attempts at another world war.
Snapple/Vitamin water – You should get that embarrassing rash checked out
Hot chocolate – Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird
Whiskey - I'm off to lead a new life as a lemon
Beer – Thanks for the Cocaine
Other – you should stop picking your nose

12) To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand – Warm tingly sensations
France - Love always
Spain - With tears of sadness
China – You make me sick
Germany – Please don't hurt me
Japan - Go milk a cow
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
USA - Best of luck on the sex change
Egypt – Kiss my butt
England - Go drown yourself
Italy - Please, don't lick my inner thighs anymore
  • Mood: Nervous
  • Listening to: Nightwish- Ghost Love Score
  • Reading: Over my notes on Things Fall Apart

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Leonardo Wellington
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
United States
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:iconkaykaytwilie:
KayKayTwilie Featured By Owner May 18, 2014
Happy Birthday!! Hope it's a great one! :)
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:iconmargaritafelis:
margaritafelis Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
Thanks for all the fave! :)
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:iconhayate-x-rin:
Hayate-X-Rin Featured By Owner May 6, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Hey Fatto, I miss you!! I lost my cellphone and I totally forgot I had you on DA until now. I hope you are doing well and I hope we can continue our love affair! ;D LOL. I sent you a reply back to our Sience Bro stuffs too. Did you ever get it? You never replied love bird. D:
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:iconmavericktears:
MaverickTears Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2013  Professional Artist
thanks for the fave :D
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:iconmavericktears:
MaverickTears Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2013  Professional Artist
thanks for the fave :D
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:iconzombiepiratefox:
ZombiePirateFox Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
you never get on anymore :(
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:iconfedelostinmusic:
Fedelostinmusic Featured By Owner Dec 15, 2012  Student
thanks for the fav! :D
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:iconspikey-t:
Spikey-T Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
thanks for the fave :)
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:icontrichardsen:
Trichardsen Featured By Owner Nov 11, 2012  Professional Photographer
Big thanks for faving. :bow:
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:iconthe-bluelotus:
The-BlueLotus Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2012
Thanks for the fave! :D
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